When you woke this morning you realized you were kinky. Somewhere between brushing your teeth and the 74th minute of your morning commute you realized that a little S&M mixed with your s-e-x might be a good thing. By the time lunch hour arrives you understand Christian Grey better than Anastasia Steele and you're planning to build your very own 'red room of pain'. Right before you put your key in the front door after your long day of work and revelations it occurs to you: I have to tell my partner... how on earth do I do that? K.I.S.S. them.
Keep It Simple Sadomasochist [KISS].
The first thing to understand is your epiphany doesn't mean your partner will be surprised. Chances are the two of you are already doing kinky things without knowing they were kinky. Your attraction to the kink lifestyle might be a natural progression to the things which happen currently in your relationship.
Is there spanking and possibly a little hair pulling during sex? You're already kink-lite. Does your partner only call you by a pet name like beloved or maybe even daddy? You're already kink lite. The big tent of BDSM covers such a large territory of people, places and things, it's very possible the two of you are doing kink already.
While it is certainly possible your partner won't be surprised, after all they often know us better than ourselves, this might be a new revelation to them. If they seem surprised by your admission take it slowly. Tell them what piqued your interest. Was it a movie? Was it an ad campaign in a magazine where the model was in shiny patent leather? Was it the new Rhianna video? If it was any of those things, show them to your partner. Give them the same visual you saw, have them read the same passage you read. This will help them see the appeal through your eyes. It also gives you a conversation opener.
Obviously sharing this new component of your personality means you hope your partner will join you in exploring this new world. Don't rush the process! Right now you are sharing, that means you are explaining without requiring reciprocity. Your partner might need wrap their head around this "new" you. This is the time to seek out resources and information the two of you can digest together. The Google will help, but those resources can also be found right here at KNKI. This is a community of people who are kinky like you, and once upon a time had to tell their partners about their desires. These are people living the life you hope to live and can give real life examples of how it worked for them.
Once the proverbial cat is out of the bag, there is a brand new kinky world waiting for you to imprint in it. Take it slow, keep it simple, and draw on the experiences of those who've been there and done that. Keep the lines of communication open with your partner, they will have questions. Be honest, be sincere and be ready to move forward at their pace. My last advice is remember; there is not right or wrong way to be kinky. There is only a right and a wrong way to practice your kink for you (and your relationship). You can do as little or as much as you feel is right for your household. As long as the two of you are doing it together and happily? You've achieved your goals and kinked it up a notch.